I love my vegetables, but…
15. Jan, 2007 
18 Comments
Those of you who know me really well are aware of the fact that I love carrots. In fact, I eat approximately half a kilogram every day – my favourites being the bags of small juicy puppies from Woolies. The type of carrots, though, that I’m not very partial to be the type TheFourths.com handed out to us in the inaugural Hashes (AKA The Stupidity Ashes) test yesterday at the Pinelands Cricket Oval. A whopping 64 run carrot!
After losing the toss the Shebeen Boys were set the task of bowling TheFourths.com out. After a sprightly start the Shebeen Boys looked to have the measure of the boys from the village, picking up 4 wickets relatively quickly. Then came some loose bowling (no names will be mentioned, but one over even consisted of 10 balls) and some big hitters (who used their free lives wisely) – this helped to rapidly advance the score to an astronomical 252 off 40 overs.
Milf hit a purple patch (a lot like the colour of his neck actually) and top-scored with an undefeated 45 but was boldly assisted by Moby “Steve Atherton” Burns on 26, Nic on 30, Dan “Sum Young Gai” on 29 and a quick fire 25 from Dave “Take me to your dealer of shaved things”.
A liquid lunch was taken (along with a few wors rolls) and then it was time for the boys from the shebeen to make TheFourths.com chase leather. All looked to be going well – even after Damon donated his wicket to the cricket gods without troubling the scorers much – Tyron (27 not out) and Chris (30) steadied the ship until the inevitable collapse. At this point I feel it my duty to mention that having just arrived at the wicket and not even having faced a ball I was promptly run out! Aaaaarg.
A flurry of the bat by Darren “Long Stop” Wilson (17) and a slow but steady 30 by Mike “Starvin Marvin Kepler Wessels” Low gave the Shebeen boys a glimmer of hope but it was simply not meant to be. Eventually, in the 33rd over, the Shebeen Boys were bowled out and had to face the media.
Man of the Match Milfred Lindemann had this to say, “I’d like to thank God for my boundless talent, good looks and athletic prowess. I’d like to thank Damon for bowling me some pies. But above all I’d like to thank beer, yes, thanks be to beer!”
This loss takes TheFourths.com into a commanding 5-0 lead in the never-ending inter-team rivalry challenge. Mildly daunting pulling it back, but then again I am reminded of a tale about a tortoise and a hare (which also like carrots incidentally).
Look out for the second Hashes test at the beginning of March 2007 (pre Cricket World Cup).
I’m hoping that box isn’t second hand. Course if it is, then not winning the thing is kind of like winning.
it is in fact used. well used. by a kid called junaid kahn. that’s what’s inked on the underside. so make sure you wash your hands after handling the trophy.
thnaks for the game lads…. also we must thank tree beard who also bowled me a few pies.
So bummed I missed it. sounds like a classic. Rolf u need to lay off the carrots and practice ure running between the wickets by the sounds of things. Can anybody say Inzamam? Maybe grow a beard for full effect. Are u going to put up one of those separated at birth thingies?
Ya, thanks for the game boys. Had an even better time at La Med. Milf; hows the hangover mixed with the sun burn?
O yes, and a big “where the f*&^ were you Rolf and Wazza??”
monday was a day not to be remembered… quite possibly the worst hangover of 2007 (and I am sure it aint gonna be beat)
Rolfzimam Ul-Fitsch and the one with the beard of a tree couldn’t make La Med for religious reasons.
Thanks guys, great game. Thoroughly enjoyed it except, losing, again and of course I found some solace in the fact that while I was getting tonked by Milf, so was Shaun Pollock by the Pakistani tail-enders, so I don’t feel that bad. Rematch revenge will be sweet.
Haha, Milf you alive!! After seeing you try sms your chick to pick you up, I was almost convinced you wouldnt make it out alive…
the milf lives to tonk dammo and tree-beard another day. think I am gonna open next time. can’t help but laugh when I think about me chirping you guys about sunblock. ha ha.
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